Muslim Children Tips

Dishonouring Parents - عقوق الوالدين One of the disobedient sons beat his father up and dragged him to a place. The father then said to him: “𝗘𝗻𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵, 𝘂𝗽 𝘁𝗼 𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲. 𝗧𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗶𝘀 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗜 𝗱𝗿𝗮𝗴𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝗺𝘆 𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗳𝗮𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿!” 📗 ‘𝘚𝘢𝘺𝘥 𝘢𝘭-𝘒𝘩𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘳’, by Ibn al-Jawzi (𝘈𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴, 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘯!) ‎ضرب أحد العاقين أباه ، وسحبه إلى مكان فقال له الأب : ‎حسبُك إلى هَنا . ‎هُنا سحبتُ أبي ! ‎المصدر :صيد الخاطر لابن الجوزى

Childhood trauma leaves a physical ”scar” on brain cells, lowering a person’s biological ability to handle stress in adulthood. Researchers at Washington University School of Medicine in St. Louis and Princeton University have discovered that early-life trauma physically alters how DNA is packaged inside brain cells. Focusing on the brain's ventral tegmental area—a region critical for processing rewards and threats—the study revealed that severe childhood stress stretches open the packaging of certain DNA segments. This structural change leaves the genes responsible for responding to stress highly exposed and easily triggered. Consequently, individuals who experience early adversity carry a molecular 'scar' that permanently lowers their biological tolerance for stress in adulthood. This breakthrough offers hope for revolutionary mental health treatments. In animal models, the research team successfully blocked the specific enzyme responsible for this DNA stretching, effectively preventing the developing brain from becoming hypersensitive to future adversity. Because childhood trauma is a massive global public health challenge, uncovering this precise biological mechanism provides scientists with a concrete target to develop early-intervention therapeutics that can actively protect or repair the vulnerable young brain. source: Creed, M., & Peña, C. J. (2026). Early-life stress alters H3K4me1 in VTA to prime stress sensitivity. Neuron.

𝗕𝗘 𝗖𝗔𝗥𝗘𝗙𝗨𝗟 𝗪𝗜𝗧𝗛 𝗣𝗔𝗥𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗦 Shaykh Muqbil ibn hadi al wadi رحمه الله : “It is possible that a supplication from the parents may DESTROY a man and RUIN his Dunyā and also his Ākhirah due to a Duʿā made against him by his mother or his father.” ‏[الرحلة الأخيرة صفحة ٢٤٠]▫️

Forcible Subjugation

Some notes regarding television Research has found that children spend an average of three to four hours watching television each day. In a 65-year lifespan, that means s/he will have spent nine of those years in front of a box. With these statistics, we realize that children spend significant amounts of time in the fictional world, engaging with this virtual world often more than they do in the real world. It suddenly becomes worrisome when you begin to realize this fact and understand its implications. Television viewing is harmful to the intellectual, psychological, and social development of children. Even more frightening is that children may be harming their souls at a very young age; often never to recover their purity and wholesomeness again. Dangers to intellectual, psychological, and social development When a child is born, s/he possesses all of the brain cells (or neutrons) that s/he will have for his or her lifetime, although these cells are not yet fully developed. This progression occurs early in life though interaction with others, stimulation from the outside world, and love and care of a parent. Television has actually been found to be harmful for the process, not allowing the brain to complete its full development. This is because television viewing is a passive activity, not an active one. The American Academy of Pediatrics has itself provided a warning that children under two years of age should not be allowed to watch any television, primarily for this reason. Much of the development occurs early in childhood, but it does continue into adolescence, so this applies to children of all ages. Nurturing Eeman in Children by Dr. Aisha Utz (formerly Hamdan); pg. 199

The word Mother is not just a noun. More than the word, Father, Mother is also a verb. It involves a lot of doings. You can have an unemployed father, but there is no such thing as an unemployed mother. To be a mother is a job in itself, and it is more tasking and rewarding than being the CEO of a major corporation. May Allah bless our mothers 🤲 Aameen

Quote of the day Ibn al Qayyim رحمه االه said: “The blessings that descend upon children are due to the deeds of their parents, and the blessings that descend upon parents are due to the d'uā of their children.” [Al Bidayah wa al Nihayah 20/416]

A child who is constantly corrected stops talking. At first, they tell you everything. What happened at school. Who hurt them. What they are afraid of. What silly mistake they made. But when every conversation turns into a lesson, every mistake into a lecture and every opinion into a correction, they learn a lesson: "It is safer not to say anything." So they stop asking. Stop sharing. Stop opening up. Years later, parents wonder, "Why doesn't my child tell me anything anymore?" The silence didn't begin in adolescence. It began the day the child felt unheard. Children need guidance. But they need emotional safety first. Connect before you correct. Because a child who feels safe will always come back to you. #parenting

Ibn Taymiyyah from a prison in Egypt: "Dear mother! I thank Allah for all gifts. I have not chosen to be here and far away from you. If the birds could carry me, I would have hurried back to you." "Dear mother! Do not think that there is anything I wish here in life as to be near you." (al-'Uqud, p. 257, 258)

⚠️ Cursed is the one who abuses his parents In today’s world, many children speak harshly to their parents, raise their voices, ignore them, or treat them as a burden. Yet the Prophet ﷺ clearly said: “Cursed is the one who abuses his father. Cursed is the one who abuses his mother…” a severe warning not taken seriously today. 🎯 Even a bad attitude, rolling eyes, or neglecting them emotionally can fall into abuse. No matter their flaws, parents deserve kindness, patience, and respect. If Jannah is beneath the feet of the mother, then how lost are those who trample her with words? 💔 Honour your parents before it’s too late. Their duʿā can lift you or destroy you.

The moment you carry your child in your arms… you finally see what they carried all along. 🤍 #ParentingFullCircle #RespectYourParents #Saychology #FromChildToParent #DeepRealization

✍🏻 Right Of Parents From ʿAbdullāh b. ʿAmr RaḍiAllāhu-ʿAnhu who narrated that a man came to Prophet and pledged to him that he will make Hijrah (migration) and then left his parents in tears, so Prophet Ṣallallāhu-ʿAlaihi Wa Sallam said to him: “Go back to them and make them laugh like you have made them cry.” ● [الأدب المفرد للبخاري ١٣]

*The Ruling On Hitting Young Children.* Shaykh ibn ‘Uthaymeen [may Allāh have mercy on him] said: “[This all depends on whether] if the child will become disciplined by being hit and there is no other way, then there is no problem with that. The customs of the people have continued upon this. If the one whom is being disciplined behaves like a baby in the cradle whereupon he begins to scream and thus his mother hits him, *then this is not permissible, because this is causing pain without any benefit.* It all depends on whether the child will be disciplined by this beating or not. If he will become disciplined, then he should not beat him and leave a mark, he should not be struck upon the face, nor be struck upon a lethal place [which will lead to major harm/damage]. Rather, he should only hit upon the back, shoulder, or that which is similar to it and it should not be a means, or cause for his destruction.” Fatāwa Nūr ‘alā ad-Darb | Shareet Raqam #345 | Shaykh ibn ‘Uthaymeen [may Allāh have mercy on him]

Love is more than an expression of affection. It is nourishment for the developing brain. Children desperately need to grow up in an atmosphere of love between the two most important people in their lives, their parents. It is not just unfortunate but often traumatic for a child to grow up around parents who are constantly at war with each other, moving from one conflict to the next. Children need to develop secure attachment to their parents by feeling loved, protected and knowing that their parents are emotionally available for them. When these needs are consistently met, the developing brain begins to internalise healthy beliefs about life: "I matter." "People can be trusted." "My emotions are acceptable." "When something goes wrong, someone will help me." Sometimes recurring bitterness, hostility or despair in adulthood can reflect unresolved emotional wounds from childhood or later traumatic experiences. Of course, we cannot determine someone's upbringing from their social media posts alone, but the emotional climate in which people grow up often leaves a lasting imprint on how they relate to others and how they see the world, and sometimes the recurring trajectory of their posts. Please create a healthy environment for your children. Every child carries their home into adulthood. Make sure what they carry is peace, not survival. Abu Imrān

The First School a Child Attends Is Their Parents' Marriage The first two to three decades of our lives are the period during which our brain is under construction. During this time, our environment plays a major role in shaping who we become and how we perceive life. The first ten years are perhaps the most critical and, since this period is ideally spent with our parents, their relationship and the environment they create at home become one of the greatest influences on how our minds develop and how we perceive the world around us. Among the many systems developing in the growing brain, three are especially important for understanding how childhood experiences shape later life. 1. The emotional processing system (the limbic system). This helps us process emotions, recognise threats, and form emotional memories that influence how we respond to the world. 2. The stress response system (the HPA axis). This system regulates our biological response to stress, helping us respond to danger and, ideally, return to a calm state once the danger has passed. 3. The decision-making centre (the prefrontal cortex). This is responsible for critical thinking, impulse control, planning, sound judgement and emotional regulation. It is the last part of the brain to fully mature. When a child grows up in a healthy home with emotionally stable parents, these systems develop in balance. The brain becomes wired around safety, with danger seen as something occasional that requires an appropriate response before calm is restored. Of course, this is assuming there are no other factors that significantly interfere with healthy brain development. In a home filled with frequent shouting, hostility, insults, threats or violence, however, the brain begins to assume that danger is normal. The child becomes neurologically adapted not for learning or exploration, but for survival. A brain built for survival cannot simultaneously devote its full resources to curiosity, learning, emotional growth and healthy relationships. Each time parents engage in a serious fight or heated argument, the child's HPA axis is activated as it tries to cope with the conflict between the two people they depend on most. When the parents reconcile, the child's stress response gradually settles and a sense of normalcy returns. If this happens occasionally and is followed by healthy reconciliation, it can even help the child develop a realistic understanding of relationships. Disagreements happen, even between people who love each other, but they can be resolved. In a high-conflict home, however, the stress response system can become dysregulated. The child may be left in a constant state of activation, adapting to danger rather than growing in safety. Some children become hyperreactive, becoming overly sensitive even to minor events. Others become hyporeactive. Their nervous system becomes so overwhelmed by chronic stress that they gradually become emotionally numb, detached or indifferent. Children also learn how to navigate the world by observing their parents. Psychologists call this social modelling. If every time Mummy offends Daddy, Daddy responds with aggression, the child begins to see aggression as a normal response to conflict. Even in otherwise healthy homes, if shouting and intimidation become the family's default response to stress, children often imitate those behaviours. The eldest child may begin using aggression to control younger siblings because that is what they have learned. Similarly, if Mummy consistently manipulates or deceives Daddy to get her way, the children learn that manipulation is an acceptable strategy for dealing with people. Before long, they begin using the same tactics on their parents and eventually on others. Many chronically aggressive adults may have grown up in environments where aggression was repeatedly modelled or where emotional safety was lacking. While this is not true of everyone, childhood experiences often leave lasting fingerprints on adult behaviour.

When parents are ill, you just want to protect them completely, offer deep comfort, and ease their pain. It is also a deeply painful experience that triggers heavy emotions like grief, fear, and helplessness. Witnessing a parent's physical or cognitive decline causes severe emotional distress. May Allaah protect & preserve our parents upon khayr. The beauty of parental love is that it’s the only form of love that is truly selfless, unconditional and forgiving. We have to earn love from the rest of the world. It is impossible for us to fully reciprocate the love we were shown back to our parents. Understanding that this can never fully be repaid shouldn’t stop us from trying though. One of the best repayments we can make is to honour them daily by including them in our duas. Also, it’s important for us to understand that as children we are a form of sadaqah jariyah (continuing charity) for our parents.

Your nervous system is your child's first classroom. Parents work hard to give their children the best school, the best home, and the best opportunities. But children are most impacted by an environment we rarely think about, the emotional one. They don't just hear your words. They absorb your mood. They don't just watch your behaviour. They borrow your nervous system. If your home is filled with chronic anger, anxiety, tension, or emotional distance, your child carries that atmosphere within them. If your presence is calm, predictable, and emotionally safe, your child learns that the world is a safe place too. This doesn't mean you must be calm all the time. It means learning to regulate yourself, repair after conflict, and model healthy emotions. Your child doesn't need a perfect parent. They need a peaceful parent. The greatest gift you can give your child isn't a better lifestyle. It is a calmer nervous system. Your peace becomes your child's foundation. Raise your peace before you raise your child. The atmosphere you create today becomes the voice inside your child tomorrow. #parenting

The safest home is the one where mistakes can be spoken about without fear. Every child will make mistakes. That is how they learn. What happens next after the mistake is important. If children expect anger, shame, or humiliation, they will hide the truth. If they expect understanding and guidance, they will come to you before a small mistake becomes a big problem. Emotional safety doesn't mean there are no rules or consequences. It means love isn't withdrawn when someone gets it wrong. The goal of parenting isn't to raise children who never fail. It is to raise children who never have to face failure alone. #parenting

_Sayyiduna Anas رضي الله عنه reports that a man came to Rasulullah ﷺ and said:_ _“I wish to participate in Jihad, but I cannot afford it”_ *Rasulullah ﷺ enquired if any of his parents were alive,* _to which he said: “Yes! My mother is alive”_ *Rasulullah ﷺ said: “Show Allah how you serve her. If you do so (duly) you will be like a: Haji, a Mu’tamir (one doing ‘Umrah) and a Mujaahid (One striving in Allah’s way).”* *_(Abu Ya’la, Hadith: 2760)_*

A father's love is seen as a precious gift and a source of strength for his daughter. #LifeLessons Your father is the most valuable person in your life, no matter his flaws, no matter his mistakes. He may not show love the way you expect, he might be tough, silent, or distant at times, but his presence, his sacrifices, and his silent worries for you carry a weight you'll only understand with time. Honour him, pray for him, speak to him with respect. Because one day, you'll wish for just one more conversation, one more glance, one more moment. Value him while you can.